herculesmulligan-quotes:

Eliza : That was Philip school calling. Apparently, he’s been using some very creative language today.

Alexander : Oh. Do tell.

Eliza : He called his math homework a “cluster duck” and his teacher a “mother flunker”.

Alexander : Did he call anyone a “sock sucker” ?

Eliza : *glares*

Alexander : What ? It’s just someone who sucks socks.

Eliza : I can’t believe you’re teaching our son loophole swear words.

Alexander : In my defense, “mother flunker” was entirely the little deviant’s creation. And very clever of him, I might add.

@laney-the-cat